Thursday, September 13, 2012

Kingwho's Top 10 Most Favorite Hong Kong Films Of All Time!!!

Don't cry for me, Argentina.  I'm just joshing.  My traffic is a'ight.  

What do you get when you take 1 Kent Cheng, 1 Louis Koo, 2 Jackie Chan's, 1 Tony Leung Chiu-wai, 1 Faye Wong, 2 Chow Yun-fat's, 4 Simon Yam's, 3 Anthony Wong's, and 1 Charlie Cho?????

Last post I posted I sent y'all on over to my buddy's blog, AHeroNeverDies, as he posed the simple yet not so simple question......List your top 10 HK films.  So, I gave it a go.  But 10 wasn't enough for me.  I went the extra 10.  So, since I know you've been waiting with baited stank breath, check out my all time top 20 favorite HK films right here.


Friday, August 31, 2012

Three By Jackie

 Leave it to U.S. distribution companies to shit on a foreign film with lazy advertising.  Jackie Chan's RUMBLE IN THE BRONX was his re-entry into the territory so you would think that a nice, big, happy Jackie mug, big ass schnoz and all, would adorn ALL of the films adverts.  Negatory, good buddy.  The poster above only shows his fist.  Is it even his fist?  Maybe his schnoz was too big?!
 Cool Fist Jackie

 Ok.  This one is a tad better. It's still shit, but it actually has Chan attached too 'his' fist.  And two Jackie's at that!  By the by, TWIN DRAGONS happens to be my most favorite JC flick.  You can keep your DRAGONS FOREVER and MEALS ON WHEELSTWIN DRAGONS is where it's at.  I'll save my reasoning for a sooner rather than later date, as my blogger/Facebook buddy A Hero Never Dies, has undertook quite an endeavour, polling other friendly bloggers on what their top 10 favorite HK films are. My list has been submitted and you'll all soon find out.  Hint:  there are CAT III movies on the list.
 And once more.  Jackie gives us the fist!

Bullets Over C-town toilet humor:
Jackie, before and after a nice stool. 

Meh. Sometimes they land. Sometimes they don't. Anyway, to check out your friendly bloggers top 10 favorite HK films, head on over to AHeroNeverDies.  Some great picks among the lot. Scroll through and see if your faves made the cut. -

I still remember when JC's GORGEOUS debuted on cable.  It was a six pack Natty Light night.  I was already pants down into Shu Qi and just couldn't wait to sit, watch, and wonder what my life would be life with her.  She's such a super lady.  Only outclassed by a-one Ms. Maggie Cheung.  And Ms. Cheug is in TWIN DRAGONS!  Score!  In that electric blue wig.  Yowza!  Nom nom nom nom nom.

GORGEOUS indeed. 

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Into The Fire- 烈火街頭 (1989)

Another Sammo Hung Kam-bo project sans the rotund one himself in front of the camera.  Instead of occupying the directors chair, as he did with SPOOKY, SPOOKY (find a few posts down), Hung produces this late 80's action-drama and hires out his stunt team so they can pay the rent.

Unfortunately, INTO THE FIRE, despite Hung's hand and this absolutely cool looking poster, is largely lackluster.  This is Sammo's first and only foray into the CAT III realm of the dirty, alas, no nipples on display.  Just foul Cantonese.  Colin Chou and Chin Siu-ho play brothers caught up in the dark side of HK and are actually finely cast, both for their martial skills as well as their young stud looks.  Both are incredibly wasted as turgid drama just blankets the film only sputtering out action few and far between.  Nonsensical considering this is a Hung production with two capable martial leads.  Also cast in the film in a rather meaty role is the the then newcomer, my pixie cutie-pie sweetheart, and usual CAT III sexpot, Chan Wing-chi.  Chan was busy back in good ol' '89 as INTO THE FIRE was her 7th film that year.   In the coming years, Chan lovingly turning her attention to the seedier side of Chinese Hollywood.   Hooray!

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Posters From Mom's Attic

Sorry for the brief non-HK movie post.  But I thought this garbage was worthy of a show and tell.   As I have mentioned before, I finally made the move to the new house.  Over the past few weeks I've been breaking my back and producing copious amounts of swamp ass juice moving house during the dog days of summer.  Lucky me.  Along with moving my HK movies out of storage and into their new home I also climbed up into my mother's attic (No, that's not a euphemism you sickos)  and brought on home my collection of non HK movies and posters. 
The posters I've pictured here I don't even remember buying?  They must have come in an Ebay lot.  Save for CHAMPION OF DEATH, I've never even heard of these movies.  This must have been a 4 a.m., shit faced Ebay purchase.  Why the heck would I buy these crap posters?

I read somewhere that SHANGHAI NOON was modeled after this film.  NO. Not really.

Starring Black Jack Chan! Get out!  You don't say?!  "These turkeys fight dirty.  Black Jack gets mean.  He kicks not their legs, but just in between."  Ha!  I must track this down.  Is this even a real movie?  This just goes to prove, malt liquor and Ebay after hours do not mix.  You've been warned.

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Spooky, Spooky- 鬼猛腳 (1988)

Would you believe I have never seen SPOOKY, SPOOKY?  Well, I don't believe it has any dirty pillows on display so maybe it's not a stretch.  But that's not being fair to myself.  I'm not a total perv.  I of course watch more than CAT III films.  And this one is in the ever important 'to-watch' stack.  Below the CAT III's, of course. 
Anyway, SPOOKY, SPOOKY is a HK ghost comedy.  The ghost comedy is the kind of high art that I do believe only HK did best.  Back in the heyday it was one of their niche markets.  And this one was directed by the great Sammo Hung kam-bo!  It's true!
Sammo stays behind the camera for this effort but a bit of the old nepotism shines it's lovely face in the form of Ms. Sammo Hung, the WOWZA YOWZA Joyce Godenzi.  That's reason enough to run this one down.
The rest of the cast is rounded out by old reliables, Alfred cheung kin-ting, Wu Ma, Chung Faat, Mars, Corey Yuen Kwai, Pauline Wong Yuk-wan, Richard Ng Yiu-hon, Billy Lau Nam-kwong, and Yuen Wah, who also did the action directing.  Chin Ka-lok also served as one of the assistant action directors.  Sounds sweet!

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Champion Operation- 哈林行動 (1986)


So, we are going from one op to another.  OPERATION SCORPIO to CHAMPION OPERATION.   Oh, you have never heard of CHAMPION OPERATION!?  Well that's for shame!  'CHAMP-OP' (a reworking of the title that I, myself, coined because I'm cool and wont to do.  It's a curse suffering such flights of whimsy) is probably one of the greatest HK shooters you have never heard of.  So now we're gonna rectify that.

A few short months before John Woo's action melodrama epic A BETTER TOMORROW changed the face of HK cinema for the foreseeable future, CHAMPION OPERATION graced HK theaters for a robust 7 days.  Directed by go-to cinematographer Lau Hung-cheun (the man's shot flick for John Woo, Tsui Hark, Chang Cheh and Ringo Lam) and action directed by the totally off the meter Jackie Chan Stunt Team member, Chris Lee Kin-sang (think POLICE STORY bus scene- head vs. pavement = actual coma!!!), CHAMPION OPERATION is as exciting as it is full of nasty grit.  Churned out assembly line style like only the finest of Walmart apparel, CHAMP-OP unfortunately suffered a sheltered fate. No more room at the inn for such action fare?  Tut-tut. 

A bit of an aside, we finally closed on our house and started the big move-in.  As I was packing up my storage unit today I came across my Ocean Shores VHS of CHAMPION OPERATION.  Below is the crappy-cool title card from the VHS. 

Entirely worthy of the tippy top of your 'to watch' list, seek this out any way you can.  Beg, borrow, steal....or download.  A little birdy told me that he knows a guy who knows a guy who runs a HK movie blog with a yellow background that may or may not have uploaded this gem to a certain website.  I don't know if it's true or not but I'd say it's worth the search to find out.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Operation Scorpio aka The Scorpion King- 蠍子戰士 (1992)

Alternative poster for the David Lai Dai-wai martial actioner, OPERATION SCORPIO.  A rather underrated fight film in the old school vein.  Liu Chia-liang and Chin Ka-lok play master and student, respectively, as they go up against the magnificent ass-kicker, Kim Won-jin and his scorpion style kung-fu.  At first, scorpion style looks like nonsense, but Kim pulls this stunt off like a champ.   Just look at Kim in the poster. That's some HK cinema villain badassery.

 The incredibly buff Frankie Chan Chi-leung.  Frankie enjoys a side of roids with his rice. 

Kim Won-jin rockin' that scorpion style!

Friday, July 27, 2012

The Peeping Tom - 赤足驚魂 (1997)

YOWZA!  Japanese AV "actress" Miho Nimoto blazes up this poster for Ivan Lai Gai-ming's 1997 CAT III beauty, THE PEEPING TOM.  Though only a bit player in the film, Miho is nips and bounds (See the movie.  You'll get it. wakka wakka wakka) the main attraction.  A few years past the CAT III prime, a film sporting this rating was usually a shot-on-vid embarrassment.  This film, not so. 

Jade Leung Chang plays a hottie Police Officer who catches the sicko eye of local perv Mark Cheng Ho-nam.  Cheng is a rapist/killer on the rampage who's hobby is to record ALL of his dastardly deeds for posterity.   Enamored with Ms. Leung at first sight, Cheng erects a scheme to snare her into his dirty lair.  Primo CAT III stuff.  Below is an oldie review I did for  It's about 15 years old and shows it's, and my, age.  Enjoy!
The degradation dependable Ivan Lai comes up with another genre winner. The Peeing Tom is Lai's 1996 effort to keep hope alive for the diminished Cat III industry and deserves a piece of the mantle along side his Daughter of Darkness films. The peeper of the title is a nasty throwback to the cut 'em up villains of the early 90's like Simon Yam's Dr. Lamb and Anthony Wong's Bunman. Mark Cheng gives a stylish and eerie performance as the sadist with a camcorder. Wielding an aluminum bat, he abducts beauties of the late night HK streets, takes them back to his den of ill repute, and films them as they scream bloody murder. 
On a fateful day, Cheng, strolling the streets of HK with camera in tow witnesses and films a police shootout, and here, becomes infatuated with super lady cop Jade Leung. For the next hour it's a cat and mouse game as Leung and her police cohorts mount the usual worthless investigation and try to catch the perverted Cheng before he gets to his object of affection. The title of the film more than meets it's expectations. This isn't Cat I family fare and TPT delivers the goods in boobs-n-blood.

There are ample amounts of body parts on display, intact and dismembered, whatever your liking. Japanese beauty Miho Nomoto is exposed for most of her screen time, for no apparent plot reasons, but for the pervs in the audience, and she gives us a lesson in abstinence while in the shower. Along with the genres wagon load of nudity we also get the usual power tool to the flesh and rivers of blood. Cheng adopts his disaffected outsider with creepiness and impending psychosis. There's a great leg (pun intended-you'll see) in the film where Cheng freaks us out by pulling a Chungking Express Faye Wong-sans the Garfield stuffed animal-and sneaks into Leung's apartment.

Once inside he films her intimate surroundings, eats noodles, watches some anime, takes a bath, sniffs her under-things and enjoys a cat nap. All cool psycho behavior. But here's the rub that keeps it from the top of the genre heap. There is no rhyme or reason to his psychosis; he's just crazy for the films sake. The little reasoning offered at films end is poor and mars the effect of the previous hour and a half's madness. 

The genre has been done to death, unfortunately, and the characterization of Cheng, which starts off promising, is reduced, into a flimsy carbon copy of the original baddies from the hey-day. That being said, the production is nicely mounted, as the city locales are well utilized. The direction by Lai is solid and the cinematography is atmospheric, colorful, and grimy enough for Cheng to hack into his work. It's all been done before but I don't care. TPT set out what it intended to do, shock and titillate. There's not much more you can ask of the genre.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Hero Dream- 淫妖豪情 (1992)

 HERO DREAM-淫妖豪情 (1992)
Here's another new comer to the stable and quite possibly my new favorite poster, supplanting the boobilicious Cammie Choi-REBEKAH poster that I once claimed to be my tops.  Ladies and gents, I give you HERO DREAM (1992).  HERO DREAM is a CAT III HK sex/action romp cheapie that once seen is not quite forgotten.  Well, in it's entirety anyway.  The film's claim to fame is not it's fine cast, consisting of the brothers Chin, Ka-lok and Siu-ho, Michicko Nishiwaki, and Carrie Ng.  Or it's swift heyday energetic action, one cool scene even set to music ripped from Miami Vice.  Nope.  The movies most mentioned scenes are of it's surprisingly liberal display of some of Thailand's homeliest transsexuals.
Michiko Nishiwaki and her harem of ladyboys.  Michiko looks delighted.
HERO DREAM displays shemales like a menagerie of curiosity also using them in the classic Chinese cinema 'Jade Vase' sense as they are either scenery or abused beyond freakin' belief.  Not only are they used and abused for our CAT III enjoyment but they are shown in various states of undress including full frontal!  The full frontal, I believe, providing a sense of shock value to this run of the mill story but also a curiosity in that HK films, up to this point in time, really didn't show, ummmmm......"male" members in it's cinema.  Oh sure, you saw a ton of little kids running around without clothes.  And sometimes Stephen Chow would flick a poor little kids shmeckle.  But nothing this blatantly adult was on view.

Chin Siu-ho stickin' it to a ho
If you were to watch this film today, these scenes, though eye-opening, are none too shocking as 20 years on from HERO DREAM's initial release, alternative lifestyles tend not to be a big deal.  Well, among most people (I hope?), and I would assume not too many of the folks that watch genre or exploitation oriented cinema, Asian or otherwise, would really bat an eyelash.
HERO DREAM also sports super sexy lady action heroine Michiko Nishiwaki's most racy film appearance as she also strips down, as seen in the pic below.  Though it's no real picnic for the pervs as the goodies aren't seen.  Sorry, gawkers.  This being said, the film is still a ton entertaining and a recommended piece of solid high trash art.
I can't wait to frame and mount this pic in my new house.  I'm thinking the bedroom.  Right over the headboard.  I'm sure if I ask my wife nicely she'll be ok with it.  Right?

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Ms. Butterfly (1993) R.I.P. Jacqueline Law

A few weeks back I got that itch.  Not the one that invades your undercarriage on hot summer days (though not unlike it).  But it was an itch that I HAD to scratch.   It was time to order more HK movie posters.  Not that I need anymore, really.  But it's an itch.  An oh so beautiful itch that I never mind scratching long and hard.  I spent a pretty penny on about 10 posters straight from HK, and they arrived this past Saturday.  Imagine my feeling coming home after a few flicks at the NYAFF to find a poster tube delivered by Ms. Mail Lady.  Also in the post were a few VHS I had forgot I ordered.  Like a freakin' kid on X-mas. 

Earlier that day I awoke to a few Facebook posts about the passing of HK actress, Jacqueline Law Wai-guen.  Ms. Law succumbed to pancreatic cancer the day before.  As Ms. Law has been far removed from the HK cinema scene for some time, only popping up occasionally in a minor role here and there, she had been placed on my minds back burner.  And honestly, I didn't even know she was ill?
Since the delivery time from HK can take a while I was actually curious to what I had ordered?  I had completely forgotten?  As I teared into the poster tube I prayed I didn't stab myself or lop a thumb off with my scissors.  I unrolled sheet after sheet with anticipation and smiled like a mental patient.  After the final poster was undone, I was confronted, face to face, with Jacqueline.  A quick heat flash of 'Holy-Shit' shot through me and at the same time was elated over this awesome poster and sad for Jacqueline's fate.  Taken way too young.

This MS. BUTTERFLY poster has almost immediately become one of my favorites.  A true to form advert from the heyday to put asses in seats.  A decent crime film centering more on females delinquency rather than young triad rascals, the films CAT III rating comes from it's over use of expletives.  Also, this sexy look at Jacqueline, all 'girls unbutton'-like with her bra and panties blazin', is never seen in the film.  I have seen MS. BUTTERFLY only once.  I have the LD and VHS, unfortunately neither come with English subs.  If any of ya'll are aware of an English subtitled copy, please point me in the direction of it. 
For more on the passing of Jacqueline Law Wai-guen, check out these links:


Sunday, July 1, 2012

Odds and Ends. A Few New Friends. And Chapman To.

Okey dokes, ya'll.  I've been pretty much lying dormant for a bit.  Trying not to go CAT III on my mortgage broker.  The RUN AND KILL kind of CAT III.  Not the Charlie Cho kind.  Ha!  She wishes!  So as the temps flare up outside and my ire is raised as I wait for the closing date on my house, I was in need of a brief respite.  And it's that time of the year for my annual ritual, the NYAFF-2012 Edition!  You can check out the site and schedule here.  I'm going to a bunch of shows and maybe in the coming days or weeks I'll elaborate more on the fest.  Maybe.  I just can't be arsed to go about it in depth like I used to. 

Anyway, this past weekend at the fest was a success as I checked out a few excellent films, including the Opening Night flick, Pang Ho-cheug's VULGARIA.  And true to it's title,  things do get vulgar.  It's has yet to be released but when it does, it's a must to check out.  It is one of Pang's best.  Outside of the fest proved cool too boot as I also met a few new goodfellas that I've only known through social media.  I've added two new blogs to my sidebar so check them out.  The first being Planet Chocko Zine and Unseen Films.  A few nice guys that I'm looking forward to getting to know better.

On a recent HK movie quest in Brooklyn Chinatown (that story in FULL is a planned blog post for the future.) a shop keeper that I've become acquainted with set aside a few HK movie posters for me.  Nothing groundbreaking.  New HK movie crap, which is exactly what it is.  Crap.  Upon returning home and unfolding poster after poster I noticed a trend.  That of freakin' Chapman To on every poster. 
It struck me as a bit funny as I have recently been seeing a bunch of To films ( he's also in VULGARIA) and came to a silly little conclusion.  Chapman To is the new Eric Tsang.  Eric Tsang's work ethic is something to admire and he now not only rears his head in local HK productions but seems to also be a commodity in Mainland garbage as well.  While To has only dipped his toe into Mainland shite, his local film output is beginning to rival the old timer Tsang.  As per the HKMDB (which we ALL know is infallible) Since 2010, Tsang has starred in 25 films.  To, rivaling that output with 22 in the can. 

And look!  It's a poster featuring both Eric Tsang AND Chapman To.  Tsang has padded out his stats throughout the years by staring in his fair share of shit films and, by the above posters, To is well on his way to achieving Tsang's filmic stature.

And, I would be remiss if I didn't mention that today is the 15th anniversary of the Hong Kong handover.  !5 years of unease, unrest, and questionable cinema.  Cinema the least of Hong Kong's problems.